Oil Pulling

ever since I can remember I have had bad teeth. the dentist would love me as a patient because he always had something to poke holes into 😏. he was certainly my Voldemort in my growing years. thankfully by the time I got to college I found the best dentist ever whom I completely and deeply love – but the issue of my ‘bad’ teeth never went away. there was no real specific reason – it wasn’t like my food or teeth cleaning habits were bad – I was told it was just the way it was.

till I discovered oil pulling – its been about 6 years now since I started. at that time I was particularly committed to doing it everyday and initially I had a lot of cleansing that came up with it – a hilarious story for another day – the moot point however is this – I haven’t had any dental work since. WHICH IS INSANELY AMAZING. of course i would expect regular deterioration to happen and I am sure that will but not in line with my own history and experience of past.

so to everyone and anyone who might have dental issues and are willing to try a non invasive, supportive medium of healing – I would say start OIL PULLING tomorrow. of course do your reading and research but it works. just to further accentuate this let me give u another example. I was in Bali (had been living there for a year) and just about 10 days before I was heading back home for the holidays – I developed a serious tooth/gum infection. I was so paranoid because I couldn’t just walk into a dentist (insane fear of them since childhood) and I couldn’t live with the pain either. Anyways I jumped into oil pulling even more extensively and got deeper into it, I worked with some supportive clay based remedies as well and while the first 2 days were insanely painful – lo and behold by day 4 it was all gone. I couldn’t believe it myself. it was such a miracle. I got back home and went to my dentist thinking there must be something left over for her to clean but she gave me a clean chit and sent me home without any treatment.

I have read that there are an incredible number of nerve endings which end up in our mouth through our teeth, tongue palette etc (please do verify this for yourself too). with oil pulling it is literally like a deep cleansing for the entire internal system. It pulls out all the goop inside and clears out the inner channels of your body especially in relation to the respiratory, lymphatic systems.

the way to do it is to take cold pressed sesame (ideally) or coconut oil and you go upto a max of 1 tablespoon for 20 minutes and swish this around your mouth first thing in the morning after you wake up. you then use a tongue cleanser and then brush your teeth as normal.

the first time I tried it I barely got more than a few drops in for a few seconds. It felt ugh! but then as I persisted within a short period of time I was a rocking oil pulling queen.

I hope this helps some of you and if it does sort out your dental/teeth issues – do check back in and comment.

Heart Opening

I feel like I have entered a wormhole and come out different on the other side. Suddenly life feels different. I feel different. The past is almost weightless. I’ve had a glimpse into my potential and it just feels so good. There is a pull upwards that says none of the shit that you held onto matters in anyway. Just let it all go. Just move forward towards your own light and potential. I think this is what a heart opening feels like. It feels warm, expansive, wide, emotional. The mind feels clear, focussed, calm. So much energy – I can’t sleep – no exhaustion – just a drive to go out there and do stuff. The gut is spinning a bit because it wants to get it all done now.

I take time out and allow this to all integrate. There is no point in blowing an inner fuse. My physical reality needs to catch up with my energetic reality. Thats all right it will. The thing to be aware of is that I don’t downgrade energetically to fit my physical system but rather upgrade it to fit my energetic potential.

Where do I start? I asked myself. I recognise all this time that I have been working on my own inner healing, there was a nervousness with sharing my experiences, learnings and growth with the world outside. Whatever the reasons each blog post would push me past a comfort zone. I found it easier to just write about the learnings and teachings that I received from various experiences.

I would now like to see a change and a turn in the way I share these learnings with you. I will do my hardest to share in a more deeply personal and authentic way – where its not just the learnings but possibly where relevant the story behind the learnings as well.

I do hope you will journey with me as I now push past my boundaries into openness, vulnerability and love.


everything today is assigned a gender . the most critical one being that whom we call God. To balance it out we have the Goddess and we spend our lifetime justifying which one is more real, true and relevant.

if we just moved past the form of the masculine and feminine and rethink them we could see that they stand for an expression of creation.

i was curious the other day about the nature of human violence – how long has it really been around? its various expressions. when looking at a historical timeline from about 5000 years ago to today one finds that violence as we know it began to take form around 500 bc.

this is also the time of birthing of several philosophies which today are leading religions. there is a setting up of religious and political orders and the rise of ‘man’. the patriarchal systemisation of a way of life.

prior to this and for centuries before communities and philosophies flourished. there were incredible civilisations that were thriving. Egyptian, Greek, Vedic, Mayan, Native American, Druids, Celtics, Aboriginals; some more earth rooted and others tending to be more mind rooted notably the Greek.

in this early indigenous expressions of philosophy and community there was a strong focus on the interconnection and importance of mother earth/nature. Fear and respect merged together bringing a sense of commune not only within themselves as humans but with the greater force that they could see embodied everything around them – living and non living. Their practises which are brushed off as being pagan and animistic today; which might have seemed wild crude and rough were also representative of the world they existed in. what we do miss out on though is the depth of softness, respect, surrender, integration, oneness they had with this living breathing tangible force of creation around them.
The Greeks felt it too and they called her anima mundi.

as humans began to settle into their environment they felt they had conquered that which had seemed beyond them. instead of recognising a space of growth and evolution into co – creation they began to see themselves as the creator, owners and makers of the world around. they replaced this potent, powerful, pulsating connection with the unseen and unknown, and began to transcribe their own systems of functioning.

power, control and ownership replaced community, engagement, interaction and intuition.

a masculine way of being is one where we assert ourselves as greater than anything else, where we claim we have the power and control to manage the lives of ourselves and others and where we also set up rules, systems and traditions of privilege to claim our power and assertion. (monarchy, caste, priests). we cannot push away the truth of an intangible force of love, power, wisdom but we can own it and encase it into a format which transfers all power to us (religion and we make this force the face of those who wish that control – a male form)

we have come from a feminine consciousness which is what the indigenous tribes and communities thrived within that is what allowed them to coexist and thrive within a world that was harsh, unforgiving, fraught with danger. it is what allowed them to read the stars, commune with the spirits of the plants and develop incredible solutions which today science is proving to be true. their architecture, systems of living and healing are still being followed by many today.

the feminine consciousness is not about man or woman it is about anyone who wishes to live a life that is connected to our force of creation which still exists in everything and everywhere but is so buried under layers of cement that its a task of a lifetime/s to find that connection again.

its only been about 2500 years of masculine consciousness which is just a blip in the timeline of earth and even human existence and boy we can see how much it hasn’t worked for us.

so don’t ‘genderify’ this consciousness of life by giving it a male or female form, for neither is true – this consciousness is a expression , an approach, a perspective of how you connect. you might still call this force God or Goddess it matters not – how do you connect with him or her is what matters. is it purely ritualistic or is it with a sense of communing – of becoming of merging with this incredible force/intelligence that permeates all of us and all around us.

Trust and Doubt

i have been very familiar with the energy of doubt and the extreme paralysis that comes along with it. wondering your next step; overthinking so much that you end up doing nada. what little you do, you question it so much that you end up as miserable as you were when you were not doing anything.
having spent so much time with this expression of energy i came to understand it deeply. it is the right hand of the ecosystem of fear. doubt is akin to shattered/broken glass. something in your life (known or unknown) caused you to believe in pain and fear. this is supported by a conviction that things are not going to work out, that you need to be in control of everything. the need for control is a defensive/protective response that comes from a need to protect yourself. i am alone, no one else understands or will take care of me and so i have to do it all on my own and the walls of defence are built and we begin to exist with an ecosystem of fear. panic is extreme doubt and fear. we are so broken like the glass you see in the picture below that we are splayed everywhere – we are in pieces and we exist as small pieces, in isolation and separation. we feel scattered, disjointed, disconnected and don’t really know where we belong and what that even means.
the great thing about energy is that it can never be destroyed – it can only be transformed. so just as you have these bucket loads and never ending wells within you filled with doubt and fear – that same energy that same quantum can one day be experienced in its other forms – that of trust and love.

love is like a gravitational force that pulls all our scattered bits together and is only intent on healing and fixing it and trust is the glue that holds it all back together fusing them so well that over time the cracks and the lines disappear and it becomes whole again.
trust is like the branches and leaves you see in the pic below that find their way to you – for you to grab onto and hold on. the only antidote to the venom of doubt is trust. find small pockets, leaves, branches that you can jump onto and hold onto. these are the experiences that enable, encourage and grow trust within you. do it small.
take it slow – every day make the intent to recognise your fear and to do the smallest thing possible that is reflective of a state of trust.
eventually a garden of delight will grow within you and it will be of your choosing.
as difficult and impossible it might seem to you now – just trust the words of one who has been there – hold on to that branch today. leap onto a little leaf of trust – small big doesn’t matter. do it everyday. take each day as it comes and focus on just what you can do today.
As u take it one at a time, eventually the vine of trust and love will root in strongly, powerfully and you will experience that transformation within and without.
with deep love…

Hi I’m back! :)

I’ve been away from my blog for years now. I had this year of intensive sharing and then I just couldn’t anymore. I guess no matter what I wrote or said; I had to know for sure who I am.

In the time I have been away, I have discovered that I am what is called a non-dualist; someone who perceives everything around them as an expression, mirror, reflection of their inner landscape. I have lived this outlook for over 15 years now but it is only recently that I discovered the terminology for it. I discovered that this process, path and practise exists in a well defined structure among vedic and other traditions.

I am in love with learning from life. I live and breathe for this opportunity. Every moment is a window to what life is telling me about myself. I then keep adding learnings and techniques to my practise on how one can shift that which needs to be transformed within.

All my writings so far have. been about sharing of these experiences and the learnings I have had along the way. I have focussed on what I see as truths – those that can be applied to any situation irrespective of the story that surrounds it.

However no matter what I learnt or transformed I just couldn’t fully commit to it. My own self doubt reigned supreme and I ended up dismissing a lot of my learnings and experiences as just coincidences or awkward luck.

I have mentioned some of my teachers in my Healing myself post and in the last 18 months I have had the good fortune of working with another teacher of exquisite skill; Dr. Kavitha Chinnaiyan of the http://Sabda institute. It was with her that I was able to recognise that my journey was one that was rooted in universal truth and that the worst thing I could do for myself was to continue dismissing and denying my own experiences and learnings. Anyone who wishes to truly transform, Kavitha is the person to study with. She offers an incredible structure within which, one is able to actually learn the principles of inner transformation and she holds the bar very high for truth. I was continuously stunned with how much my own journey was synonymous with her teachings.

What I do have is a growing understanding of the importance of sharing this truth in anyway possible. This knowledge has helped me in ways I could never have imagined. The only way to serve this knowledge or vidya is by sharing it forward.

All I can intend is that by reading my posts, a desire or spark for true change and transformation is ignited within and that it grows within you a willingness to traverse the journey to true inner change. My earlier posts will help you understand what this journey is about and as we go along I will also continue to share more such experiences.

Is there an end point? No. I have been on this journey since 2003 and I am still going. I am still learning, growing, evolving, refining, improving, changing, transforming. If you read my blog Beware! Swimming can help you find your true self it might offer you some insight on this continuous journey.

More than anything as I write here today I am grateful. Deeply grateful that life always shows up and teaches me what I need to learn. All I got to do is ask.

Right or Wrong

I found this in my drafts folder today – written in august 2017 ❤️


Right/ Wrong. Growing up these were big words in our lives. School and parents both stressed hugely on what was right and wrong and our thoughts and actions were continuously modified within the acceptability of that which we inherited.

So where does this all fit in with ‘independence’? When we get locked into a series of definitions that have been imposed upon us – but eventually accepted by us – we lose our individuality and independence.

Consciously or not, we tend to find ourselves constantly comparing and judging the thoughts and actions of ourselves and others, based on the concepts of right and wrong. Our approval ratings are influenced and measured by social trends and acceptance. Our desire to be accepted by the majority is so high that we don’t realise it is reflective of a sense of low self worth.

Most of us in an effort to experience freedom and independence step onto a path of questioning. This spiritual path comes with many options. We all need practises and tools to help us on our spiritual journey but which ones are the right ones? Most of these tools and practises are tied into a label of sorts. Yogini; shaman; galactic; energy healers; earth people; cosmic people; star seeds; vegan; non vegan; raw; ashram; meditators; buddhist are just some of them and the sub groups within each of these is even longer.

If we enter this path  and seek to fit in; it can get intimidating. Here too, there are the perceived cool and the not so cool groups. To fit into the cool groups you begin to imitate their habits and follow their tools and practises. Once in the group there is an expectancy to stay committed to the tools and practises so that you are then ‘identifiable’ as a member of that group. This might be language, dress, habits, interests in addition to the mentioned tools and practises/ Interestingly the opinion on the right and wrong in these groups doesn’t seem any lesser than ‘regular’ life – and the judgement scores are pretty high here too.

The thing to remember is that if you truly want to experience your freedom you have to be independent in your choices and constantly examine the motivations behind them.

It could very much be that the label that you choose is the right one for you for that moment in time.

Ultimately though there is no right or wrong. There just is the right tool and practise for you at that present time. So if you are looking for a way to start or deepen your journey – you must stay above the board of labels. There might be a practise or a tool within a type of group that might be perfect for you and may step up your growth and it might only last for 3 days – months – years – or some a lifetime – that depends on YOU. There is on one youer than YOU (thanks suess) and so your YOUness should demand and command your choices not someone else’s YOUness. For that is theirs and you are YOU. So how can you choose anothers path – and how can someone else’s right and wrong determine yours? So you have a unlimited world of opportunities tools and practises to choose from. You may need to be vegan but if the day comes when you no longer need to be one – you should be free to be able to let that go and move on to the next right for your current life.

Ultimately our faith should be such that if the Universe is flowing us in a direction it will never take us to where we don’t want to go or to a place that is truly harmful to anyone else. We cannot even hope to understand the larger scope journey and choices of the Universe and ultimately why what it is -is. Isn’t it the greatest gift to just know our own motivations intentions and desires and to understand if they exist within a positive flowing network or within a rigid closed egoistic framework. If it is the former and that requires you to eat meat – so be it – trust that if you are responding to your space of TRUEness then you can not make a decision that is wrong for you. It might be wrong for another but that is their path.

I have met enough spiritualists to know that they are conforming to the labels that have been put onto the path and are probably more disconnected to their truth than another who isn’t even on a conscious journey. Wearing the clothes and chanting mantras doesn’t make you a spiritualist – it is your inner motivations and your inner space that determines your truth and flow.

So focus on the shine and sparkle within and allow the outside to eventually shine and sparkle right back at you!

Deep love always!

Eclipse into your true power.

FullSizeRender 2Today is a very special day! A rare second new moon in the same month. A double eclipse in the same sun sign (Leo) – a greater rarity. A total eclipse over one continent only (US). Even greater rarity. This definitely calls in for some insane acknowledgement.

There are always enormous layers to the messaging of a day like today and it is fair for you to pick any of them. Broadly it is a day when you should allow your mind to be wild and free in its imagination and possibility of creation. Call in your deepest desires with a sense of deep empowerment and know they will manifest for that is your truth and power. Immense imaginative powers are at play here, so use them to enhance your collective potential. Call in the best of yourself.

This is a time of great potential and celebration.

Yet, there is a need to consider the aspects that come in the way of us experiencing our complete power and in turn our collective best. We must acknowledge the darkness that shades the light. This eclipse is a total solar eclipse that is visible only within the US or as a play with words within us.

Those in power can help or abuse. At present those in power in the US, are opening up channels for people to express their true selves – so that means if they are bigots and haters then they are coming out in their fullness and expression. Those that stand against bigots and haters are also coming into their full expression.

Yet one thing to keep in mind is that whether we are the white supremacists who hate or the ones that hate the white supremacists – it matters not – the word HATE is the common denominator. This is true for humanity at large.

While we may see it highlighted in the US it is not a US problem. It takes bravery on a soul level for anyone to stand up to be a mirror to darkness and if the US has chosen to be so – that is only its bravery and that of its people. Ultimately, these shadows exist within all of us – to a large or smaller degree in an acceptable or an unacceptable manner. We today function as a global community, and hence we learn from each other. We should acknowledge this lesson is as much for us as for anyone else.

If we want to experience our true power than we have to be brave. Brave is not the fight outside of us but the fight within. The darkness we see outside of ourselves lies within us. While this might seem like a ‘wrong statement’ especially for the good guys – it is the truth. Ultimately if we are affected by this anger and hatred and bigotry, it is so because even if it be dormant, it still exists within us. Rather than wait a lifetime or lifetimes for it to rise and show itself we can use the energies available to us today to work on our darkness (eclipse) especially the spaces of anger, hate, bigotry(US). In recognising these exist within us – we have the opportunity to allow the light in as we set new intentions (new moon) to shine our brightest best and experience our ultimate true power (Leo).

Hate lies in the heart of those in pain. In healing our hearts we are healing our pain leading us onto experiencing our true power.

This might not be an easy journey which is why Inner power (empowerment) exists in the heart of the true and brave.

We must all RISE to be better versions of our selves. What we do as individuals affects the collective.

Be strong – be wild – be free!

                                                                                                                                                                                         pic credit: ellie vaman

The 3 branches of life

For a long time I saw Life as a flow between the spaces of giving and receiving…

We believe we can only truly live when we have received enough and so we chase that elusive next $. Chasing it we end up losing focus on the quality of life that we are currently living.  Sometimes we earn or have so much we stress out on how can we give or share more – for many they feel good only when they have the umbrella of “giving” attached to them as it enables their sense of worth or goodness.

In between these two lies a third branch. Living. It might seem as such an obvious statement. One might think ‘of course we are all living – if we are breathing and we are alive – then we are living’. Yet do we live mindfully?

Mindful living includes the actions of giving and receiving. Yet rather than let outer motivations define which actions we engage in – mindful living allow us to do so without judgement. There is nothing I ‘have’ to do – there is what I must do or need to do from an inner perspective or knowingness.

Happiness is a destination we all seek. Yet there is no where to journey to.

When we hold the fallacy that a place, time or person holds our key to happiness we shall always be waiting or seeking. Happiness exists in the now; in the present moment. It is in mindful living that we find happiness. For in that mindfulness we are able to receive the guidance of our inner beingness or God. This guidance can be deeply profound or simple. It might help you understand the mysteries of life or just be a GPS to the choices that you make in your everyday life.

The initial effort must be to work towards this space of alignment. For those that have dedicated their lives to this purpose will experience a greater alignment than possibly you or me who have chosen to straddle both the spiritual and material world. Those people grow into masterhood and are able to be the physical gateway for masses thereby attaining the title of Master. Yet, it is possible for each one of us to achieve a fair degree of inner alignment which is useful in navigating us (to a fair degree) in our regular everyday world.

In this space of living your inner guidance will tell you where to apply your focus. So you might be in the space where you need to earn and work and make a lot of money. Or it might be that your purpose is in the space of service. I know that when I stopped working for personal reasons – there was always this desire to be back at work – contributing…yet, as much as i desired it or believed it was what was needed it didn’t really happen. The reason for that is because it was not the right time – there were other areas i needed to focus on and work with.

We define our worth by situations that we believe to be suitable or  acceptable -so working in a corporate day job is more acceptable and perceived as more valuable than setting up a home for example.

However, that is only a perception. It is when you are willing to rise above all these perceptions and just trust your inner guidance that you will realise that what you are doing right here right now – is actually what you are ‘meant to be’ doing. That is your current immediate present purpose. Eventually in the ultimate overview of your life it will all makes sense.

So whatever it is you think you should be doing or should have done. Stop. Take a moment. Breathe. Breathe till you experience an ease in your breath. Allow it to settle – Promise yourself that your present time will be focussed on becoming more present. As you promise that to yourself you will find solutions on how to do so will appear up for you.

As your inner presence grows your present will come into greater alignment ease and peace.

Be blessed!

Matter is me.

We know there to be 4 core states of matter – solid, liquid, vapour and plasma.

We are matter hence we too are solid, liquid, vapour and plasma.

Rather than look at these states as separate entities or fractions, we should allow them to come together as different expressions of the same fabric.

So just as these 4 states reflect the matter outside of us they are also the states we embody within. These 4 states co-exist and impact each other, causing complexities and variances within the visible form.

The solid state is our physical body. The most visible state. It is the form that we embody.

The liquid state is our emotional body. Our feelings which influence our mood. Their inherent truth is to flow and to glow (if i might add) 😄. A flowing state is one of grace, love and ease.

Vapour is our mental body. It is the unseen but is runs as a constant track consciously and unconsciously absorbing developing creating belief systems and thought patterns. It is as critical as the other unseen vapour of our life; our breath. Which is why in meditation, breath is linked to our state of peace and calm.

Plasma is the one that excites me the most. It is called ionised gas. Simply put it comprises of electrons, ions, atoms and molecules that react to forces created by electrical fields. It also carries electrical currents and generates magnetic fields. It is believed that the visible universe is made up of 99% plasma. While it is invisible like gas, it is different as it carries within it all building blocks of matter which are electrically charged particles at high energy.

This just so amazing because essentially this is the 4th body that all esoteric wisdom talks of – our energetic body. The body in which we hold our energetic impulses and the electro magnetic frequencies – it is our electrical charge – our pulsation our vibration. While it is not visible it shows up through our impulses via our gut and intuition. We call them vibes – we can sense them but most often cannot make sense of them. It is so subtle it is overlooked and ignored but in fact holds within it our full power and potential. It is this that connects us to the fabric of all creation and is the energetic web through which all is one.

What is very important to understand is that all these bodies are interconnected and thus impact each other.

So say one consumes physically poor nutrition; this creates toxicity in our body triggering negative emotional reactions like irritation and anger in turn creating unpleasant physical experiences which then build up our beliefs that life is tough and hard. Overtime this impacts our energy creating within us energetic blocks that then impact the potential of living your best life. It doesn’t always start in the physical. It could be an emotional breakup which causes so much turmoil that the mental belief turns into mistrust and resentment thus causing us to indulge in unhealthy physical experiences possibly turning to unhealthy addictions. This once again impacts our energetic structure creating a denser vibration – a thicker grosser expression which then translates into blocks and struggles.

We then have experiences of a lower vibration which in turn confirm our mental, emotional or physical struggles making them real. The story becomes real and then we are stuck within a downward spiral.

The good news is we can heal these blocks and clear our vibration and raise it to a misty sparkling dance. We can do it by starting at any of these bodies. We can start with clearing either the physical, mental or emotional bodies; by letting go of encumbered actions, feelings and thoughts. Optionally, we can work with energetic modalities which directly heals our energy body.

Science today talks of matter having more states than just 4, they are very subtle = just as ancient wisdom talks of us having more subtle bodies than just the 4 obvious ones. That just shows the depth of inner discovery that lays within us.

For now however, when we are united in all our spaces and states; when they all begin to individually vibrate at the same frequency that our energetic speak becomes powerful and complete.

We would then have incredible access to our most powerful state where lightness, magic, synchronicity, alignment, balance, ease, peace reside – this is where we are in the flow.


Mother Earth: a reflection of our sacred space.

Earth is an incredibly beautiful, almost perfect planet in our solar system. Without doubt, she offers an experience like no other. Is she so by chance or is there another intelligence that makes her so? Holding this mystery that is continually unknown, she urges you to seek further and deeper no matter how far you may have come.

Joseph Campbell said, “Your sacred space is where you find yourself again and again”.
According to some belief systems we are born multiple times on earth. If that be so; she seems to be a sacred space that we keep finding ourselves in again and again.

Is she the sacred space outside of us that is reflective of the sacred space within ourselves?

Mother Earth is also Mother Nature.

In seeking the eternal question – Who am I? We seek to understand our immutable infinite timeless self — which we can really only understand by understanding and realising our true nature.

Today, most of us identify natural spaces as landscaped gardens. However, Mother Nature really shows up in her verdant glory only in spaces that are largely untouched by man; which today, are few and far between. If you happen to know some of them you will find her magnificence of natural beauty within the diversity and variety of her creations; forests, seas, corals, mountains, valleys, flora, fauna, sunsets, sunrises… What we as humans seem to have forgotten is that we too are one of her creations.

The true purpose of natures beauty is to:
– create wonder and awe
– inspire a feeling of transcendence
– evoke the realisation that we are part of nature
– realise there is an intelligence which balances this divine perfection called Nature.

The true purpose of life is to find that connection with Source. An undeniable fundamental alignment that you can anchor yourself within and live from.

Mother earth blog pic.jpeg

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